A pep talk to myself

I wrote my thoughts when I was in Antigua, just leaving NYC and walking away from agency and corporate life.

I walk slowly, sun descending.

The same familiar road. My heart on my sleeve hanging, exposed.

Not sure this feeling. Is it because my triggers alarming?

You’re alone. Yes, I told you so. Mind reminding.

Define alone. Aren’t we all alone? Aren’t we all journeying through this life disconnected, reconnected, love and love loss? Why does it feel heavier in this moment? I mean, it’s not that I want a home with a picked fence and 2. 5 kids. Or that I’m against it.

Like that old sweatshirt, pilling and holes. Yet, I wear it and feel most comfortable in its embrace and familiarity. Go slow my heart. This is a familiar feeling but it’s your brain tricking you. Because its rooted from it's childhood pains when you were 7 and disappointed and hurt. It’s not the present. In this moment of pure freedom. The world is your oyster kind of freedom. You chose Antigua. You left Miami. SF. NYC behind you because you know even through all this uncertainty there is something out there around the corner for you. I believe it. I believe in you. Now go get it.

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