Swiping Right Mexico City

Your photos came off that you didn’t take life too seriously and liked to surf. SWIPE. I had a feeling we would match!

This was the type of app where I had to make the first move, I responded with a clever but not trying too hard comment about your surf picture. You responded immediately with the small talk of what I’m doing in your city and how long will I be here.

Then an invite to your friend’s birthday party that evening with photos of mariachi bands and tequila to entice me. (You know the way to a girl’s heart.) Even though we never met, I was new the city and always up for an adventure. I met you wearing my favorite top by sark, it was a tailored white button up with tiny green pills for buttons and green polka dot pants I made. I topped it off with fringe-oversized earrings.

You came outside to meet me. We organized our stories of how we met because we both agreed saying swiped right felt like an inappropriate first introduction to his friends. We walked in. The place was a massive cantina in Coyocan. The neighborhood of Frida Khalo and Diego Rivera. The mariachi was playing in our small private room where all your friends were already rosy cheeked from multiple tequilas.

We laughed, you played the cowbell, and everyone sang. I loved it. The energy was infectious and when we said our goodbyes we decided to walk around the neighborhood to get another drink. It was Friday night and the neighborhood was alive, especially in the park. There were tons of people gathered, families, couples making out on benches, performers showing off their talents for tips.

We wander the park, going from performer to performer, stopping at a rap battle which you translated for me. My favorite was an impressive Michael Jackson impersonator. I was over stimulated and floating from the excitement of this newness and thrill. We spoke about Mexico and community, how in this park, entertainment and a place to gather was free. Something we both agreed was not common in the US.

We found another cantina, grabbed a mezcal and I slowly felt the effects of drink #4.

We hopped in an uber and you said I should come with you to your family’s house in Alcapulco next weekend. I ignored it and smiled. We went to a bar in Roma to meet your friends. You told me about your business, how you used to designed hotels. How we found it funny that we both were in parallel work.

We went to a place called Departamento, more of your friends were there. We drank and smoked cigarettes on the patio. I tried on your asymmetrical kimono inspired blazer and tried not to keep it. We left to go to MN Roy, a club where inside looked like a church for vampires. I think it was 2 am. More dancing, more blurriness. Then against my own rules, we kissed, right there among the vampires.

The next two days we met up at lunch and hung out all day. Non-stop wandering the city like our own Before Sunrise. You were Ethan Hawke and I was Julie Delpy. The giddy-ness of potential. You asked me again to join you in Acapulco. You already texted your Aunt and asked her if I could come with my dog. In my mind, I didn't really believe the invite was real so I said, maybe.

Then I slowly stopped hearing from you. No mention of Acapulco. Then one day, you asked if we can hang out, I said that I had yoga and will get back to you to find out what time I was free. I got back hours later (purposely) and you said you had “change of plans and your friend got you tickets to a concert.” I said have fun. You responded with a sun emoji. We never spoke after.

Not sure what happened. But I was left perplexed and wondering why. Was I playing too hard to get? Did you just want a quick hook up? Were you even serious about Acapulco? Apparently I had a lot to learn in dating app world.

I can't help but reflect all the little love affairs I've been having. Spending time with someone and showing them your insides, when it ends, even brief, it takes a toll on one's heart. Not that I was heartbroken, but definitely a little bruise. I was left to my ego attacks. And beliefs of not being worthy.

Then I thought how funny it is to be ghosted for the first time at 37. People still did that?

Oddly enough, months later I heard from him. We were friendly and he casually invited me to a wedding. I said, maybe.

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