How our belief systems can effect our daily lives and how we can rewire them.
I recently watched this Dove campaign where they said only 4% of women actually believe they're beautiful. The ad shows different women coming in to describe themselves to a forensic illustrator who then draws them without actually seeing them. Then, the women come back to describe the other women they just met just a couple minutes before. The two sketches are put side by side and shown to each person. What a difference the two drawings are, the ones that were self described was colder and angry looking, more further away from reality. Even the language they used "bad chin" vs when they described the other person "beautiful smile". It made me think, why do we hold ourselves to this distorted belief? Why is it typically negative? How can we see ourselves for who really are?
On my self expansive journey to live a more meaningful life and career, the concept of belief shaping your reality is something I've been thinking about a lot. And the idea that we live, and at times blocked by, a spectrum of our own filter, aka our belief systems.
This reminded me of the color blue. Historically, blue was the last color in the spectrum to be identified. There was never a word for it until the Egyptians made blue pigments. Proving without a word for the color, it's hard for us to actually recognize it. I highly suggest googling the concept of blue, it's intriguing that language plays a role in what we acknowledge. Which leads me back to belief. Since we all have our subconscious playing a bigger role than we can day to day acknowledge, then what is our own "blue"?
Stay with me here.
I was raised in the 90's 1st generation filipino in a country, where as we know now, extremely polarized, limiting in many aspects for minorities. For a variety of reasons, my beliefs were shaped that I could not be seen. That I needed to survive, meaning a job that I work hard, don't actually have to like or align with my natural abilities, get paid and that's it.
Fast forward to present day, where I've one way or another, got to indulge in my curiosities that was very far from my inherited beliefs of living a safe and controlled traditional life. I used to always hear this voice, this belief that I can't be seen. That what I am doing is all wrong. That I'm an imposter. That I'm not talented. These beliefs made me make decisions from a place away from my authentic self. My path, my inner compass, my truth. There was a lot of lessons to learn along the way. I still hear that voice sometimes, but I'm aware of it now. It's more of a whisper and it's not leading my decision making.
I had to recognize what those beliefs were. Sit with them, see where they originated from. Be friends with them. And constantly repeat they were not true. Then determine what was actually true and use real facts from my life to prove it. For example, one belief, "I'm not talented." That came partly from not having the support of parents ever telling me I was. From being bullied for thinking or acting differently in grade school. I sat with that for a while, cried a bit going back to that place and remembering how alienated I felt. I then created an affirmation, "I belief in my unique talents." Then wrote a whole list of evidence of my talents on my phone. And every time I would get insecure about my abilities, I said the affirmation and read the list out loud. Note, our voice, is very a powerful tool. It's connected to breath and our body. I treated this like a prescription, something I did in the morning or whenever I felt insecure. Another thing I liked to do was make a note on my phone whenever people pay me a compliment or point out a point of view, like "you're really funny." An opportunity to see an outside perspective and then to reread this list whenever I needed some truth alignment.
Our beliefs play a strong role in how we live and design our lives. If we want to truly co-create, we must acknowledge if our beliefs are aligned with who we actually are and take action to rewire them to what is true for us.
Some additional videos that helped me wrap my head around belief and how to reshape them: